Understanding Body Augmentation w/Yom Tov Glaser

Why do we etch our skin with ink or alter our bodies with piercings and surgery? Uncover the deeply rooted psychological motivations behind body augmentation, as we discuss the quest for meaning in a transient world. With special guests Robby DomeTownBlyte and Bobbitt, we peel back the layers on self-esteem's influence on these permanent decisions. Plus, get a sneak peek at my forthcoming book, "Incident Marriage: The Four Faces to a Love Relationship," where I delve into how self-worth weaves into the fabric of our intimate relationships.

Prepare to challenge your perceptions as we explore the phenomenon of pre-rejection in niche subcultures and its connection to the world of tattoos and piercings. Find out how these modifications may serve as a shield from societal judgment, and consider the health implications and cultural shifts that have reshaped our views on body art. We also touch on the spiritual implications of personal appearance through the lens of various religious teachings. Wrapping up, we express our deepest gratitude to our loyal viewers and hint at an exciting new chapter: our own content platform, where the conversation can continue, unbound and unfiltered.

Transcript

Coach Ratner: 0:00

This is the Living in Clarity podcast. I'm Coach Ratner, and here with us today is Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser. It's great to see you again. There you did. It was. Yeah, we were at. Yeah, we filmed a lot of them from the number months ago and some of your shorts just went crazy, especially the one about Jordan Peterson.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 0:15

Yeah, uh, big fan.

Coach Ratner: 0:18

Yeah, big sell. It was funny. People feel like you're criticizing, really saying anything about that.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 0:24

And if I'm ever critical, it's only because you know, when you put the mind of a genius like that, I mean the guy's really a genius. Yes, he is. If you put his mind to any one thing, he's going to come up with something great, yeah. But we're also like you and I are, at least in our present lives have hooked into like thousands of years old tradition in Juviel. Sure, there's no way Peterson's not going to contradict that sometimes, where the deeper insight will come from our tradition, sure, which is like. I know that sounds very ethnocentric, but the proof's in the pudding. I mean, go take those ideas down to the real bottom of the barrel and you'll see that there's going to be like I'm waiting to meet Jordan in a podcast. I'm sure that's going to happen. So if we take it down to the depths there and blow everyone's minds, I think he was here in Jerusalem with Ben Shapiro a year ago.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 1:21

Yeah, it was very painful for me. I couldn't sleep for three days. What Do you go? Yes, I went and I hated it. Why? And with some hot cobbles, because I would, I wouldn't be up there. I have a web to say here and I'm just watching it, not getting set over and over and over. Sure, it's making me crazy.

Coach Ratner: 1:38

I've had that experience been. I know that I do know that experience very well, yeah, so today I want to talk about something you know my classes have been very vibrant, a little self-esteem, and in my new book coming up I have an equal coming out called Incident Marriage the Four Faces to a Love Relationship, which should be out April, probably April 2024, which is the month or two, yes sir.

Coach Ratner: 1:59

And that will be available on Amazon and those that you can press. But I want to talk about this idea. I have what things that happen that people do when they have low self-esteem, and I have a chapter called Tattoos, nose Rings and Plastic Surgery, and I want to know what you have to say about that. Body augmentation, yes, and not just by, not just, like, you know, lobes of your ear, but I would call it earrings that are not in your ears, you know or tattoos, and I saw some data was really surprising. You know, what do you think about tattoos?

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 2:32

Uh, I think that you want to hear something interesting.

Coach Ratner: 2:37

Yes.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 2:40

I mean, it's a crazy, a crazy journey to take these thoughts forward. But one of the things is that people in their deepest, deepest cells, hate the temporal nature of life. They hate the temperedness of this world. We yearn so much for meaning because we know we're going to die and we want that our living hours should be deeply meaningful and the temporal nature would kill it Because it's like as much as it is it'll end.

Coach Ratner: 3:17

I was, if we knew life was not going to end.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 3:20

Yeah.

Coach Ratner: 3:21

Would we not be searching for meaning as much, because we're like oh, we're going to live on forever, so why do I need meeting my life? We're the exact opposite. No one's going to die, no one's going to be here for a few minutes. Therefore, we've got to have meaning in our life, and yet we don't find that. We search other things that we think give us meaning, which really don't.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 3:36

Yeah. So you'll notice that just in the human lifespan, like, let's say, 70 years. So you see, teenagers tend to blow off like a good 10 years of it, from 15 to 25, they're just like all over 10 to 25. Maybe today adolescence goes on forever, but that's part of the nihilism that I was going to talk about. But what would happen? If you look early in the tour, people are living like hundreds and hundreds of hundreds of years, which means that the teenage times where you just blow everything off, could be 200, 300 years. So you'll notice, with the second part of the tour of Noach, god changes it to 120. From now on it's going to be 120 years, like the max, or at least the you know.

Coach Ratner: 4:18

With the hour, how it looks like 900 years or something it lived a long time.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 4:23

I think I don't made it, 900 or maybe.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 4:26

But the thing is, is that with the short of time we put on our running shoes, we're less likely to waste too much time today, which is a very nihilistic time, you know, since, as Nietzsche said, since they killed God when he said God is dead, since the modern secular world killed God, you take God off the top of the pyramid, so things start devolving quickly, yeah, as we see in today's world, right, and then things devolve and that need for meaning, which is which is our deepest, deepest need, people can't nibble with.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 5:07

The fact that that, first of all, the life is temporary, is painful enough. So now that I know it's temporary and I don't know when it could end, because it could end at any moment is the, is it? Well, it better be meaningful, sure, now, take God off the top of the pyramid. Meaning, take that seeing eye off the top and and and now meaninglessness is kind of a king, the, that then, that need for meaning is, and the need for really an eternity, is, is, is, is going to get perhaps even stronger, meaning your need for eternity, knowing that your relationship, that's forever.

Coach Ratner: 5:54

Then we're still fine something. But you say eternity. You don't mean I don't make the assumption. You don't mean our bodies live on for eternity, you mean our soul, them all returned.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 6:03

It's, it's just in this desire that things should last. I mean, if you go to a concert, at the concert you should be enjoying them. Is it the course there's a party knows it's going to no.

Coach Ratner: 6:15

I don't think about that. I'm usually enjoying the concert and we're all enjoying the concert, but you know it's the but. When you get towards the end, you know this, the single last song, that is the most enjoyable part of a concert. You know it's ending, just like when I'm on the ski slope I'm taking the last run down. I am like this is the best run ever. You get the most leisure.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 6:34

You're unique. Like that's not on people I'm bummed Like, are you? So yeah, I'm bummed to the last song, and it's not just me, yeah, everyone is, and they you're unique. Okay, I try to get pleasure out of everything, though I really we're enjoying the last song for everything it's got, but we don't want it to end. We don't want anything. You know what's this? What's the pain of a being in love?

Coach Ratner: 6:59

The pain of being in love is that some days we're not going to be together. I mean, I, I see I feel that pain, you know, for a boyfriend's girlfriend's.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 7:06

they are for her husband's wife.

Coach Ratner: 7:07

I'm enjoying that. I need my wife 10 years early, Like I'm like, and my wife said you would have passed in behind the street between me and me 10 years. She's right, I would have. I wasn't showing up.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 7:30

My wife and I were going up north and she was like. She was like you're not gonna be able to mountain bike there, it's gonna be muddy, and she's worrying about me.

Coach Ratner: 7:40

Yeah, yeah, I'm just like I just wanna be with you.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 7:44

And I told her five days this morning, cause she's like where are we going? And I said we're just yeah oh nice. And just being together. Yeah, wherever we wind up, doesn't matter to us.

Coach Ratner: 7:54

Lens I'm always happy with. I'm traveling with my whole family and my kids. I got a great job. It's amazing, like even on a platter they don't need me at all, even when they were like five and six and good by themselves.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 8:06

Five of my kids are going to Rome this week and two of my daughters already landed. Okay, I dropped them at the airport. What are they doing on the train? In the morning they're at a wedding of one of these like crazy wealthy people who took out a hotel and and I was like you're not going, hey, we're not going. Oh, your kids are going. Yeah, I shopped for food in one of his supermarkets last night. Oh, the guy. As I was paying my 2000 Shekel bill, I was like can you enjoy? The wedding.

Coach Ratner: 8:36

I'm going to help, I'm going to help, I'm going to help. Let's get back to it. I wanted to discuss the symptoms that people might have from low self-esteem, which is tattoos, I hate to say it. Nose rings, which I know is all them being, you know, controversy and Controversy. Controversial. Mind nose rings, I think, because the ones that go in the middle of septum, I, I, I, I am, I guess I haven't been done spinoff. They look like cows and I Google it. It says that cows wear nose rings because it helps them, I mean, wean from their mother, from their mothers, without having to move, stress, and and when I see a young person with a nose ring and their septum like it'll be a cow, and I don't know, I don't think they, I don't think they know they look like cows, I think they knew they looked like cows. Unless they had low self-esteem, they probably wouldn't wear it out.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 9:25

Well, you should know that there's. There's the whole style called Gost.

Coach Ratner: 9:29

Yes, Well Gost, their mouth is to 80.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 9:31

Right, but it's very much connected to it. They're not trying to look pretty. None of these people are trying to look pretty. That's one thing that's important to note is that all the body augmentation stuff going on today in that in the nihilistic community you know that's women in Beverly Hills doing augmentation. You was not that okay. All that augmentation is is a not to look pretty. And the whole Gough thing was it's what I call pre-rejection. Pre-rejection meaning meaning I'm ugly or I think I'm ugly. I think I'm ugly. Or people said I'm ugly, people don't love me, people don't love me, so I'm already gonna pre-reject. Would that way buffer me from?

Coach Ratner: 10:15

any rejection Right, so that that that whole thing is a is a. You know, when I'm giving a dating and marriage class to be guys like, yeah, I don't wanna get married, it's not that they don't wanna get married, it's that they know they're not capable of loving somebody else or allowing themselves to be loved because they have low self-esteem or other issues, and because of that they put that barrier out to protect themselves from getting into a relationship, knowing they're not gonna work. They know they're not capable of being loved or not capable of loving somebody else. So they're like, oh yeah, I don't wanna be married, I don't wanna be married. Or, and when they that's a Gough's attire on these augmentations we talk about it. I think those things are low self-esteem. I think there's all stemming from Not all of it, but a majority of it.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 10:54

It. It may be low self-esteem. I know a lot, I know a lot of beautiful people in really good shape who would never oh would you, who have low self-esteem.

Coach Ratner: 11:07

Do you realize that your skin is the largest organ you have? It's important, yeah. And if you paint down I remember the revelation If you paint your skin with paint, your acrylic paint, you're gonna die. Your skin has to breathe. You're in second-large organs your liver. You'd never consider putting a tattoo on your liver. I have the stats on the read this this is a. This was a clinical psychologist. Henry Carson from Lynn County, iowa, said at a 15 year period took all the death sentence counting and local counties 430 people died. Added as the one in 30 people, 300 had no tattoos and 130 of them had tattoos at that. A lot of people with tattoos. Yes, it's always listed on the corner report. The average age for without a tattoo of death was 53. And the average age with a tattoo was 39.

Coach Ratner: 11:57

Yelch, that's significant Talk about eternity, this again shortening, or I know and I think there's also evidence that shows that people young people use that have tattoos have a much higher likelihood of dying from drug use and testosterone and the tattoo don't cause this Right. That too don't cause you have a tattoo. So right in the east is the surf all the time. No more servers have tattoos.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 12:30

There was. It was very interesting. My father, as liberal as my upbringing was in the A boys very permissive, is LA, la and he had this old school thing from his Yiddish and background of his Graham, you know, is this era? Yeah, and my father's in the 90s Ones alive still, yeah, yeah, he was able to sprang up during a Holocaust. You remember watching his father cry? You know, news was coming in this father. He was a kid but anyway, there was a rule no, no piercings In those days. We don't, you had course, no viruses.

Coach Ratner: 13:15

No tattoos. When you were younger in the 70s it wasn't that. 80s it wasn't very popular, became popular when basketball players started getting tattoos. There were boys. That too I this is my opinion and then I've spread to the kind of like the other communities, maybe the sub communities, and and, and, and rap, rap artists, and then begin it just come by by, yeah.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 13:37

Right.

Coach Ratner: 13:37

Right, right.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 13:40

By. So the Torah has a general thing saying don't go in the ways of the idolatrous in those days and most idolatrous, and don't go in the ways of the obelisk, which is a very big thing, you know. So it couldn't be even an Erica, yeah, a certain type of Erica. And then the Torah goes on to list some 50 things that they do, that you should do. So it gives a general which means that you can't even wear the sweater they were wearing in that became a popular sweater, and the mini. You're breaking into our commandment. That's like eating pig. Yeah, is wearing that sweater, sure so. And the other is that. And then it lists one of those things is, for example, in Mohawk, we have to have notice, my haircuts, the inverse, because that'll argue shave you, shave this road here, shave here and we all rest of societies and Breslaw shaved his head, don't they?

Coach Ratner: 14:39

and have the is a Breslau that does that and they have. They shaved their head, but they have won't pay us. I've seen that. Yes, they have. Look at me. Yeah, I guess you should. So are you considered Breslov?

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 14:49

No, but I everyone's a bit Breslov, because Breslov's the working on your very intimate relationship with God that has nothing to do with anyone else. No prayer books, no synagogues, no church, no, nothing Like everyone's a Breslov. Or if they just develop their personal relationship, I guess I'm a Breslov, or also, anyway, one of those. You're definitely a Breslov. Anyway, one of those is this inverse of the might makes right societies, which was to shave here and to grow here. The Nazis like the Vikings like.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 15:23

Mr T. Remember, mr T, all the wrestlers, the sumu wrestlers, even in the jungles, the Yamamama Indians, or the serious warriors of the Amazon. They're the ones that you can see. They have like a very fine hair, yeah, yeah, shaved around the sides. Anyway, tattoos is also on the list of things that you cannot do. Tattoos is on that list, and because it is. Oh, what I wanted to say was that in the old days, when tattoos came into practice, there were always pictures of dietics.

Coach Ratner: 16:03

Right. Of course, before people put ma ma right or the girlfriend which is, it's such a, I have to say it's just a short, short-term decision for such a long-term thing. I mean, I don't even know tattoos, but not so easy to get rid of tattoos and believe it's not. You have to like it takes a lot of work to get rid of them. But, like you put a picture of a girlfriend in your arm, they see you break up and it's definitely the rest of the world.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 16:26

Which goes back to our original discussion, which was permanence.

Coach Ratner: 16:30

We liked, we want that permanent, is that well?

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 16:33

especially if life is meaningless. If life is meaningless and the biggest painful thing about that is ultimately and all of this we can't unravel it from death, because I don't know why exactly. I mean, I'm sure we could get into it, but we don't think we should. But there's something about the impermanence of life as the ultimate bummer.

Coach Ratner: 17:00

Well, I have to tell you, I think the reason why many social media people do the tattoos or get the tattoos is because they're looking for a meaning and purpose. As a quick six, you feel bad about yourself, you can't afford Louis Vuitton purse or the warship that it, or you don't go on and get the plastic surgery. You see, you know what I'm going to get a tattoo, I can go do it right now. It takes a lot of takes and I can do it pretty cheap and I think it's a quick six for people's. And then to get another one and another one next to another. They're, they're whole bodies tapped out and I think I really believe the customer was off the steam. They're not happy for the art and they're looking for meaning, purpose or life and they'll go anywhere to get it.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 17:36

Again. I think Louis V steams it. I think it's in every Hummer drivers deepest. What Porsche? Porsche, yeah, you name it. You know the every, every big business man, every voluptuous woman walking by. This low self-esteem is is pervasive in all people and and I had it.

Coach Ratner: 18:01

We all, we've all you've gone through, I've gone through it. That's what I did. I don't know if you've ever done with it no, I'll, you're young with it. But I think writing this, this book, and my pre on that in the year has really helped me to be a much Happier person with who I am, and I don't feel like need to share it people. I don't feel like I'm a minute or share my wisdom. I only did I really to share my successes. I lead the brag. I don't think that it's it's. It's still a journey that I've really loved to see everyone go on.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 18:28

Yeah, but even for you and I, our public in the public eye. You know they Take it away from us and watch. Couple weeks go by.

Coach Ratner: 18:41

We take with. Oh, take our purple for sona. How take it all away? Oh, I'm miserable, but I don't if I'm not teaching on visible. I love teaching. It's not like Well, I could have a classroom I taught foundations that they should tour this last week and it like four or five died in the class and I was thrilled. I'm like I'm like, so happy to be teaching, definitely.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 19:02

I love to do. I'm worse than you if I work. People showed up my class.

Coach Ratner: 19:05

I'm like you know this was a Sunday. This, you know.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 19:08

Yeah, remember that child last you should know I stopped that course because of that. Oh yeah, meeting when I noticed the numbers worn out by that.

Coach Ratner: 19:19

Yeah, we should start a sound dish. We should start essential for man in like Places easy to get to, like central bus station or downtown Tel Aviv, and I've been calling like this, lord Plotnik, that, like that we shouldn't, and I'm looking for somebody to do a seminar with. I'm like you know, I spoke last night. It hurts Aliyah for all on me and think I was like fifth people's great, but I'm looking for always listen to embedded people. Look, let me speak, let me teach, let me make your life better, yeah we need that.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 19:46

And, and you know, I used to always say that in every country there's something you must see. In Paris, you gotta go to the Eiffel Tower, you know, sure, and you got to see the changing guards. In London, you know. In San Francisco, the Golden Gate, these things, statue of Liberty. In New York, the, you got to see these things. So what is the thing you got to see? An Israel? The answer is not something to see it close out, it's learning, it's wisdom. Yeah, so wisdom is our tourist attraction. Yeah, and yet, people, you know, at least since Corona, when they shut down, basically every when you, the, they never got back up, for at least English speakers, never they lost that chance to Hear now the wisdom of Israel.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 20:33

You know it's pretty sad I it bothers me daily, yeah, that there's nowhere to do that, and not to mention to the back that I don't have rid.

Coach Ratner: 20:42

Who would either? Well, you make you have your own seminar. She did.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 20:46

There was nothing like that daily dose oh no, I was great.

Coach Ratner: 20:49

Did you speak every day? We were in.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 20:51

Oh, you're so rain. New kids every single, oh my gosh, what a blessing that is.

Coach Ratner: 20:55

You know, it's a lot of fun. It's a lot of fun. Yeah, I was doing two bad two days a week when they had these such as program on and I was thrills, I just you don't know yet.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 21:04

Every day, a packed house and me and I hit record about in 2014 maybe. Yeah, I just said, forget I'm hitting record.

Coach Ratner: 21:13

Yeah, and you, by the way. I have a friend in lives from Maryland. My mom said Maryland To plead the least after with you, and he listens to you all the time.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 21:20

I have like 700 hours on YouTube, yeah, and there people binge watch it. I get emails. They're saying I'm done, are you gonna be doing more or should I just start again? It and sadly I wrote I think you better start, and this was during Kuro.

Coach Ratner: 21:36

It doesn't mean it's not gonna happen again. You know, like you, you, you, we, let's work on it. We have to make our own venue, you know, to help with our own blows up of steam. You have to make our own venue so we can teach at wait more than the Baby wants to nurse, a mother wants to feed.

Rabbi Yom Tov. Glaser: 21:52

Yeah, okay.

Coach Ratner: 21:54

Well, you know I was a lot more talked about. We have another podcast with you coming very soon but we got a little bit into tattoo they blew. It's on better, more. But I want to say thanks so much for coming on this show today it's great and thanks for living to the living in Clary podcast. We'll see you next time.